ON TILT

Here's a weird symptom on WebMD's "Symptom Checker."

"Yeah, Doc, I'm having difficulty swallowing... 
and I've noticed it gets worse every time I drink a big glass of poison."

BABY IN A BOX

Here's a warning label that was affixed to a plastic storage box I bought at Target. When gifting a baby this Christmas, don't put it in a box — be responsible and wrap it in a festive mylar bag.